At a resturant: Tip-ing is not a city in China.

Seen on an electrical appliance store: Go modern! Go Gas! Go BOOM!

Emergency evacuation plan posted in various places around an office building: Run like hell!

At a septic tank service: Call Monday thru Friday, sorry, we haul milk on weekends.

Billboard sign on a highway: Nobody reads billboards...but you just did.

In an airline office in Copenhagen: We take your bags and send them in all directions.

In a Bangkok dry cleaners: Drop your trousers here for best results.

In a hotel in Zurich: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

On a dock: Safety ladder, climb at own risk.

In a doctor's office in Rome: Specialist in women and other diseases.

In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.

In a laundry in Rome: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.